Emily in India

I made it to Bangalore (Bengaluru) on Tuesday, August 1st after a 27+ hour journey.

Sunday, July 30th: One of the hardest, if not the hardest day of my life to date. There had been so much anticipation for my rotation to India and it had taken many, many months to happen but when my last weekend at home finally arrived, I wanted time to slow down. Bryan and I spent the day together, dreading 1:00 pm when we would leave for the airport. Got to the airport, rearranged a bag for proper weight distribution, got checked in and then we sat together in a hallway, just holding hands, crying. When 3:00 pm hit, it was time for me to get through security and to my gate for 3:40 pm departure. I’ll save you all the details but saying goodbye to Bryan was a heart-wrenching moment I’ll likely never forget. I gave him one last wave as I turned the corner to TSA security. I sobbed at the gate; the flight was delayed. I sobbed as I boarded and as we took off. The gentleman sitting next to me was kind enough to ask the flight attendant for some tissues for me. My plan was to try to get on Indian time as soon as possible, which meant trying to sleep on this flight. I closed my eyes but wasn’t able to fall asleep.

The plane landed in Phoenix an hour and a half later and my 52 minute layover had been reduced to 12 minutes. The flight attendants announced that me and one other passenger had to run to another gate to catch a flight to London and run we did! We were greeted by attendants in front of the gate yelling, “Ms. Curtis?! Passport! Get your passport out! Hooray, you made it!” It’s a good thing because the next flight out didn’t have any open seats in business class. 😉

The flight took off moments later and the crying ensued. I cried over a yummy dinner of short rib, twice baked potato, and green beans. I think I was able to hold it together for the hot fudge sundae. I read my book (Meditation), listened to a book on tape (Shantaram), listened to Taylor, watched a movie (Triangle of Sadness), and slept for about 2 hours.

The business class experience (my first!) was very nice. The little pod was private, moderately spacious, and included a lay-flat seat. The restroom was the nicest I’ve ever seen on a plane.

Monday, July 31st: Landed at London Heathrow Airport around noon on Monday. It’s been many years since I was in London and even then, I was only there for 6 weeks so I did not expect the nostalgia I felt being there. I thought a lot about my trip to London in college and the things I’d do differently if I had the chance. Turns out, that is great motivation take full advantage of being in India. I found the lounge, freshened up, had some water and coffee, and cried. By the time I realized I needed to start the 20 minute walk to the gate, my flight to India was boarding.

This plane was not as nice as the plane from PHX to LHR but apparently, the one we were supposed to be on had some technical issues so I guess I’m thankful. I sat down and the tears came and kept coming. I was so tired, so lonely, and so sure I was making a huge mistake. The flight attendant couldn’t help but notice and asked if everything was okay. I assured her it was but warned her that this wouldn’t be the last of my crying. We sat on the runway for 1.5 hours – I fell asleep, woke up, and we were still on the runway.

When my dinner was served, I was far too emotional and tired to eat. I pushed the food around the tray while I cried.

I purchased WiFi for this flight because of how sad I was feeling. It was really nice to connect with Bryan, Jeanne, Jake, Bethany, Robert, Paul, Stacey, Kimmy, and Victoria. All were empathetic, loving, and encouraging. I couldn’t be more thankful for such wonderful support.

I tried to sleep, tried to watch a movie (Aftersun), tried to read. I was restless and sad but eventually got 1.5 – 2 hours of sleep.

Tuesday, August 1st: I landed at Kempegowda International Airport in Bengaluru at 6 am. I was approached by airport staff near baggage claim, offering to help with my bags. Since I had 4 that I could hardly lift myself, I accepted their assistance. Three bags appeared on the carousel soon and eventually it was clear that the 4th was not coming. The men helped me navigate to the station for lost luggage and I was informed that my bag was still in Phoenix. I completed some paperwork, stood in a very long line of other travelers with misplaced bags, and filed my case with customs.

There was some confusion around paying and tipping the airport staff who had helped me. One insisted that 1 US dollar was enough but I didn’t have cash so I pulled rupees out of an ATM – much more than $1’s worth – they insisted it wasn’t enough but eventually, they gave up trying to get more from me.

Two hours after landing, I met the hotel driver outside the airport and headed to my new home in India, the Grand Mercure Hotel. I was exhausted and in a daze but looked around as we drove, taking the city in. It’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen before, except in movies. Cars, motorbikes, scooters, rickshaws navigating traffic with no stop signs, stop lights, or road lines to speak of. People dressed in traditional Indian clothes and western clothes. Buildings labeled in English and Hindi and painted all different colors. Green trees, bushes, and flowers everywhere something could grow. Old buildings, run down buildings, partially built buildings stalled during construction, and beautiful temples.

I got to the hotel at 9:30 am, checked into my room, opened my bags to see which of my 4 was missing (two bags were the exact same so I wasn’t sure which I had). Fortunately, I had all of my work clothes, toiletries, medications, and most of the nicknacks I brought to make it feel like home. I showered and laid down, setting an alarm for 1 hour to make sure that I didn’t sleep the rest of the day. My driver picked me up at 1 pm and took me to the office. I was greeted in the lobby by my “buddy” (my Indian counterpart, designated to show me the ropes) and my boss (Chief Compliance Officer who I had the opportunity to meet in Florida last year). We got my badge and my computer; he showed me around the office, took me to my desk, and introduced me to the team.

I can’t explain the jet lag daze but will try: I was off balance, tired but wired. Every few minutes it would hit me, “I’m in India, I just moved to India. I haven’t slept in 30 hours” and felt a little out-of-body. Unsettling for sure but I was determined to stay awake so that I could sleep that night. Everyone was quite impressed that I made it into the office. I didn’t tell them that my other option was crying all day in my hotel room.

I left the office at 5 pm. Mallappa (my driver) dropped me back at the hotel where I spent the next few hours crying and chatting with anyone I could reach (Jeanne, Jake and Bethany, Bryan). I felt a bit like I couldn’t breathe, like I couldn’t possibly survive this secondment for 18 months and asked myself “what the hell was I thinking??” It was daunting and devastating. I was so tired. I fell asleep at 8:30 pm and woke up on Wednesday at 8:30 am. Day 2 had commenced!